I know you're hoping for some permance
I just can't seem to muster up the will power to go to class. I'd rather go without dinner. Which Im not going to either.. Probably.
I guess I waot be getting my test results back tonight. Worst part is, I am going to smile and make like I did go to class if Jason asks. But i'll avoid that happening.
I know that whatever tests I do poorly on from now forth will be because I have not been going frequently. But seriously. Concentrating in that class is like speaking farsi to me! It's hard. to say the LEAST. It's so rare that I understand the concepts better when taking instruction from the teacher. And forget asking him to explain things. If I did do super poorly on this past test, I know I will have to re-take the class. So sad. So sad for me miss super duper good GPA.
I wanted to cry and cry the night J helped me study. He is a great tutor. i can't comprehend how he gets it. There's some things in algebra that are sensible, that shine out into the dark abysmal night of my muddles comprehension. and I can solve the problems!!!!!!
But mostly the rest of it is slime. And when I try to solve it, it's like crickets chirping in the backround. EVen though perhaps 15mins ago I was solving a problem similar and doing fine. Even when I *know* what I'm doing. I'm sorry college degree, you'll have to wait a while because I can't sigure out how to solve a solution set by the Addition Method. The Subsitution Method makes more sense and can be accomplished occasionally, but I have to do the addition one on the test.
Oh for fuck's sake, for the first 3 math classes, I was past the "but I don't ever need this for my degree or for real life" argument, but I'm back to it.
Back to me being tutored. I can't stand not understanding how to do something. I don't care if I'm GOOD at it, but a basic comprehension would be nice. It sucks more than an amazonian river full of leeches not getting it and having my boyfriend (who, in reality, is better at everything than me) get it and explain it to me and I *Still* can't do the fucking problems. Or , he helps me, i get it I can do the problem we practice on, but another problem comes along and knocks me over, taking my lunch money, and my dignity. It's bad enough having to take all this crazy math for an English degree, but to fail miserably at it....
I've never failed any class before.
It's like that time I got a "B" on a paper in American Lit. I cried for an hour.
not because I didn't deserve it, but I can do better.
I *know* how to do better in English, there's ways to go about it.
But math??
All is not lost, however. When I fail, I can take it again, the next grade replaces my standing grade, and I'll get a better teacher. Like the guy Jason had or even the teacher from my previous math class. Damn you college I attend for switching professors on us and not telling!
I guess I waot be getting my test results back tonight. Worst part is, I am going to smile and make like I did go to class if Jason asks. But i'll avoid that happening.
I know that whatever tests I do poorly on from now forth will be because I have not been going frequently. But seriously. Concentrating in that class is like speaking farsi to me! It's hard. to say the LEAST. It's so rare that I understand the concepts better when taking instruction from the teacher. And forget asking him to explain things. If I did do super poorly on this past test, I know I will have to re-take the class. So sad. So sad for me miss super duper good GPA.
I wanted to cry and cry the night J helped me study. He is a great tutor. i can't comprehend how he gets it. There's some things in algebra that are sensible, that shine out into the dark abysmal night of my muddles comprehension. and I can solve the problems!!!!!!
But mostly the rest of it is slime. And when I try to solve it, it's like crickets chirping in the backround. EVen though perhaps 15mins ago I was solving a problem similar and doing fine. Even when I *know* what I'm doing. I'm sorry college degree, you'll have to wait a while because I can't sigure out how to solve a solution set by the Addition Method. The Subsitution Method makes more sense and can be accomplished occasionally, but I have to do the addition one on the test.
Oh for fuck's sake, for the first 3 math classes, I was past the "but I don't ever need this for my degree or for real life" argument, but I'm back to it.
Back to me being tutored. I can't stand not understanding how to do something. I don't care if I'm GOOD at it, but a basic comprehension would be nice. It sucks more than an amazonian river full of leeches not getting it and having my boyfriend (who, in reality, is better at everything than me) get it and explain it to me and I *Still* can't do the fucking problems. Or , he helps me, i get it I can do the problem we practice on, but another problem comes along and knocks me over, taking my lunch money, and my dignity. It's bad enough having to take all this crazy math for an English degree, but to fail miserably at it....
I've never failed any class before.
It's like that time I got a "B" on a paper in American Lit. I cried for an hour.
not because I didn't deserve it, but I can do better.
I *know* how to do better in English, there's ways to go about it.
But math??
All is not lost, however. When I fail, I can take it again, the next grade replaces my standing grade, and I'll get a better teacher. Like the guy Jason had or even the teacher from my previous math class. Damn you college I attend for switching professors on us and not telling!
posted by the red baloon at 8:05 PM
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